Nice Guys Aways, Always Finish Last. In Last Place, that is.

Sometimes, i just can't help hating everyone and everything. Maybe its because i've not had enough sleep. Maybe its because the TT commitee suddenly had internal troubles and decided to reduce the people
participating, thus conveniently removing both me and my friend,
also my JR classmate, so there aren't any more JR participants.
Maybe its because that whole excercise wasted alot of my
frigging time, and wasted my efforts and money going there just
for a stupid 3rd audition which was supposed to not have
happened. But only found out about who was kicked out today,
and we were not officially notified either, i found out about it
through one of my PR friends who also participated in the TT. 4
days of waiting for a reply and they didn't even have the bloody
courtesy to inform us we were out. And, to add whole
bucketfuls of salt and acid to the wound, some of our other classmates had made a nice banner for us beforehand. FUCK this TT thing. If they have the bloody nerve to tell me to do their goddamn drama, i swear i'm gonna bloody lose it.

Maybe all the 'traditional' values do not apply today anymore. Being a "nice"
person doesn't cut it anymore in this "modern" world.
Everywhere you look, lying, greedy, selfish, self-centred,
arrogant, weak-spined, traitorous, back-stabbing shites do far
better than "good" people.
Maybe being an asshole is better. Just look at jerks like Jay
Chou. Pretending to be badass, have that stupid smirk on his
face, and generally trying to make people identify him as a "Bad
boy", which all those legions of mindless industry cash-cow zombies eagerly suck up like sponges as "cool" or "in".

Being "nice", on the other hand, only makes other people think you're easy to take advantage of, naive, easy, stupid or something equally demeaning. Many people have said i'm "too" nice. Well, if niceness is scorned, then i can see what is the logical way to go.

Maybe i am just too foolishly idealistic to believe people will appreciate "niceness". No, make that was, past tense. Callous, apathetic and insensitive people certainly seem to get it better. Tho i've tried my best to stay true to my personal integrity, and making a point to do all the "proper" things within my abilities, tried my best not to fall into the Mainstream trap that Industry set, i find i'm always getting the short end of the stick.
I have had it with this. Although whats been done, cannot be undone, i sure as HELL am not gonna continue being goddamned disrespected because i act "nice". If being callous and uncaring is what it takes, then so be it. Death to this "nice guy". We'll see just what remains.

Thank you, for making me realise that.
Although time and tide has not waited,
and certainly has not been kind,
your words really opened my eyes.
And now i do see. And realise.
The knife has finally cut deep enough to sever.
And i see much clearer. Very, much clearer.
I'll send the bill for a new phone to ya.

And here's a very special ode, to comemmorate its demise.

GREEN DAY - Nice Guys Finish Last

Nice guys finish last. You're running out of gas.
Your sympathy will get you left behind.
Sometimes you're at your best, when you feel the worst.
Do you feel washed up, like piss going down the drain

Pressure cooker pick my brain and tell me I'm insane.
I'm so fucking happy I could cry.
Every joke can have its truth and now the joke's on you.
I never knew you were such a funny guy.
Oh nice guys finish last, when you are the outcast.
Don't pat yourself on the back, you might break your spine.

Living on command.
You're shaking lots of hands.
Kissing up and bleeding all your trust, taking what you need.
Bite the hand that feeds.
You lose your memory and you got no shame.


-Rinse and repeat as many times as necessary to get the goddamn message that nice guys always finish last, firmly implanted in your skull, numbnuts.-

Heh. You live, you learn, eh? They say Life lessons were gonna be hard, but whod've expected it to be this hard, ay? You live, you learn.